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getting there from here

My dad’s on a plane to Accra right now. His first trip to Africa, ever. And I’m moderately freaking out in my head. Even though I know everything’s gonna be ok. It’s just that, I can’t help thinking about how he’s going to hang out – soak up some sun/work on his tan – and help some people out who are living in a Liberian refugee camp [~30,000 people]. My mom went to Morocco a couple years ago, and came home with GBS. Now, supposedly, the two are not ‘necessarily’ linked. Technically, she could’ve developed GBS here. But she didn’t. How do you not associate the disease with the trip? I can’t separate them, even though I want to.

But actually, I don’t think about that too much. I’m not a worrier. I’m the kind of person who has random/brief freakouts, but [for the most part] remains fairly calm throughout all kinds of sitch’s. Calm was once THE goto descriptor for me when asking a friend or acquaintance about me.

I’m also really full of pride that he’s gone – that aside from sunning himself on the beach [if you knew my dad, you would get why that is funny], he’ll be teaching first-aid classes, and generally using all the medical knowledge he has at his disposal to help, while he’s there. He took the shots, the pills, got his visa, packed his bags [and duly weighed them]…and he’s off for a two week trip.

it just feels weird.

In other news [about me], I’m still kinda dealing with what I was talking about before…going to a place where I felt like I immediately belonged to the group, because of our shared cultural experience. And as time went by, it became abundantly clear that that was not the case at all. I had stumbled upon an online haven for esoteric white people. A place where they can congratulate themselves on their forward thinking and their interest in causes, though, for the most part, they remain untouched by policy/issues that affect those they discuss. Being an online atmosphere, as long as no one knew I was a POC, they could continue in sharing sometimes ignorant race rhetoric. Once I could hold my tongue no longer…well…I became Caroline. [h/t Racialicious]

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